Have you read The Game by Neil Strauss?  It’s credited with popularizing Pick Up Artists (PUAs).  Dating has become enjoyable again for the many men who’ve read the book and are following its guidelines.  Whether you’re new to dating, or feel you’re pretty experienced, the tips laid out here should help you in your dating life.

Before looking at techniques, let me point out that there are really two different types of pick up artists.  Memorizing different routines and stories to impress women, the first type works very hard for success.  These stories and routines are each intended to impress women and attract them to the PUA, and to ensure his success, he carefully crafts and polishes them.  Mystery is the prime example of this kind of pick up artist. 

The “natural game” is how Strauss characterizes the approach used by the second type of PUA.  Success with women is achieved by putting his own natural charisma and personality into play.   This fellow will approach women confidently, and his conversation will be spontaneous, natural, hence the label.  A good example from The Game would be the PUA called “Juggler.”

Now there’s nothing wrong with either approach.  Personally, I like natural game the best, but if canned routines work best for you, by all means use those. There’s a lot of work involved in memorizing all that material.  I find it far preferable to have a woman attracted to me because of my own wit and personality – who I really am – than to know she’s attracted to me because of some tale I spun for her.

Whichever technique you use, though, one of the most important pieces of advice I can offer is this: concentrate on the real you and your inner game.  Who you are – your beliefs and your self-confidence – is what’s meant by the term “inner game.”  This means that if you yourself feel unattractive, or shy, it’s likely you’re not going to approach a woman you find really attractive, regardless of the routines, tips and stories you’ve made up and memorized.  But if your self-confidence is high – that is, if you truly believe that you’re a likable and attractive guy, then you’ll be able to approach most women without any concern for being rejected.

Another point: take it easy.  These things take time.  Concentrate on the basics – your self-confidence, your inner game – and as these things improve, you’ll find yourself with more women than you ever dreamed would be possible in your life!  Now if something’s holding you back – if there’s some sort of obstacle in your path – concentrate on overcoming that thing first.  For me, it was shyness.   I prescribed myself a special challenge.  To overcome my shyness, I had to stop and talk with 100 strangers a week.  You’ve got to figure out way of overcoming the obstacles you run into.

I think, though, that of all the advice I could give, one of the most important is also one of the simplest: be consistent. Once you’ve found (or developed) an approach that fits your particular personality, stay with it!  Wannabe PUAs will invest a ton of money on all sorts of material that promises to show them how to be successful with women, but they won’t give any of the techniques and strategies time to work.  Afterward, they’ll complain that none of the techniques work.  Of course, skimming doesn’t work in a case like this.  Most of these guys, if they’d understood and applied what they’d learned, would have enjoyed dating success long ago. 

Thus, my last tip is to explore the different styles, find the one with which you’re most comfortable, and stick to it.

If you liked this article and you want to learn some more PUA tips and routines, check out Pick Up Artist Tips and How to Pick Up Women.

More Articles